finally logged on once again..
to pen down all my thoughts my thanks and my everything.
sorry i have left this place to grow mould. dust and cobwebs. all thanks to those who never gave up on me during this period of time where i isolated myself from the world around me.
sorry i chose that way to recover. sorry i appeared cold. sorry i shutted myself away.
the times we had together. the talks we had. the laughters we had. the many many that we did. thanks and gratitude is how i feel.
pls don't misunderstand that the above was written for him. i am tired of saying things to him. so fat hope that they are for him. cos i have many many ppl who gave me those. so much other friends who loved and cared for me. and i am so glad to have them in my life.
... here's my little thank you list (not in any order)...
claudia.. i know i chose to hide and run. time has sort of healed me. i am ready to step out. thanks for waiting for me. and always by my side regardless how i chose to run. let me have this chance to be there for you whenever you need. thanks babe.
junie.. the one far away from me yet always giving me the advice to step out! thanks for listening junie. although u are far.. u know how much u are misssed.. pls come back real soon.
jingmei.. mei mei. the one to tolerate all my whinnings. my complains. thanks for the cheering up. the KTV sessions. the beer. thanks once again. you had been the one supporting me right from the start.. thanks! muack!
meiling.. bee!! my drain sister. you totally know how i feel and i am glad to have you during this time. although it's not easy. i know you are always here for me to cry to talk to hang out and of cos to feel so loved.
ligen!! my da jie.. thanks. thou i know u will not read my blog.. but here's to you. cheers. thanks for being the one to let me sms and disturb for nights when i feel sad and missing him. thanks for waking me up from that silly dream of him. thanks for going out with me and keeping me occupied this period of time. you deserve a thumbs up... but dun think that $15 i will forget! hahaha..
pauline babe.. another decade old friend who supported me and kept me sane from thinking so much. thanks for all the rational explanations. thanks for keeping me in track. really glad we had that shopping therapy. thou it didn't help a lot.. i am glad we spent a great day! waiting for the movie date tmr!! hee
qinyu and jillyn.. thanks to these two ladies.. who showed me life is more than what it is. whenever i am down. these two decade old laydees whom i knew never fail to show me care and concern. thou we seldom meet but each time we meet. i really appreciate that i always have you guys at the point in my life when i am feeling down... thanks for showing me all bout life.
my uni friends.. ppl like aimei!! my talk cock partner. ruoxuan for sharing her 'incident'.. my usual lec khakis like deyang and jian cheng!! without these ppl.. i guess uni is just somewhere to kill my time. thanks pals!
who else who else.. hmmm..
yes. i have since felt life is better. i started my jogging and swimming routine. so used to that.. keeping up and being disciplined bout it helps make me stick to what i have decided. running to god's house is a source of comfort for me daily now. thanks to my lord. thanks for picking me up once again that i have fell. thanks for being the one to carry me up for i only see one set of footprints now. without your guidance in my heart.. i guess i am still not recovering. you have made me realise how life is beautiful. just to open my eyes and see that i have another day. my time in this world is finite. when things are meant to be let go. i have to let go, don't i.
all in all.. i feel better today. as of now. life is busy. i found my way back as a catholic again. i guess this is what he has it all planned out for me. i joined CSS - my first time going for cell group. and yes. finally attending mass by father fred after SO LONG! hahaha.. never failed to make me think more into homily that he says. i leave everything up to god now. if this is how my life should go. i shall leave it all to him.
it's not easy to come along this way. but i am glad my friends never gave me up. i am still letting go. at least i don't look back now. at least i moved on. hoping the next will be better. hehe.
so my friends. how have you guys been? if i have lost track of anything much.. don't leave me behind!! elaine is back!
oh.. by the way.. some pics to actually remember all the memories i had throughout this lonely period where all of you guys stood by me!!
- with courtesy of qinyu -
- at paulaner with the poly gang -
- christmas 05 -
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