my re-start button

Did I share this before? I can't remember.
But I really do miss travelling already. Thou it was a "dying to be home" by the end of two weeks away, now less than a month, I am seeking to be away. again.

I guess the ability to be away means I can hit my ass (translate to chinese) and go without any worries.No one to report to, one one to ask permission from (well, except from my parents whom I still seek to hear their opinions). I miss the feeling of being away in a foreign land and be different. I miss the writing home to my family and friends. I miss the calls I make home just to hear their voices. I miss wasting time in a cafe in the afternoon just to people watch. I miss being the only or few chinese girls among the streets. Where I look around and see no resemblence of home and familiarity. Everything and everyone seems like a new adventure. A new book which I have yet to touch. It appears that I want to step my foot on every new land. Ideas of exploration starts filling my head. I have yet so much to live for.

Up ahead, I have planned weekend getaways for the remaining months of this year.
July - Bangkok (if the protest doesn't worsen),
August - Kampar - Perak for White Water Rafting and Waterfall Abseiling!! (totally excited for this)
September - Bali (Our first Girls Overseas Trip which I am so looking forward!!).
As for October, it is a month for weddings.. 2 weddings on 2 seperate weekends has detered me from planning any short trips. My pocket is going bust with this rate of weddings happenning around me. Garrrr! November, maybe I would like to bring my mum and dad to Hongkong
December, I am really thinking of going for another holiday =( like to nearby Cambodia or Vietnam...

With all these trips planned (and in process of planning), I realise I have the urge to get away quite very often these days. Maybe I am slowly hooked onto travelling. hooked onto being different from who I am in Singapore.


And at this moment, I realise I am not ready to die. I am not ready to surrender to God. Thoughts of leaving this world came across my head (for like 5 seconds) when I realise jabs and needles could be my best friend for the years onwards. I would rather die than to be jabbed was what I told myself when the doctor told me that this was it. Thank God, it was only for 5 seconds. Now as I sit back and ask myself what kinda life I wanna go ahead living, I would say a life that is lived to the fullest. I want to work hard but play harder and love harder. Thou the road ahead seems every shaky and rocky, I see friends and family who would walk with me. And I thank God for them. Their simple presence in my life. I guess slowly but surely, my life is changing, for better or for worse, I still can't figure out. I want to see and do so much more in this life before God decides to take away all human strength from me.

This is a new beginning.