my ramblings kept within

*knock knock*
- beware for this post is VERY LONG -

It has been a while since my last posting. February came and flew by and we are soon to welcome March.
Chinese New Year came and left. 15 days of festive cheers. 15 days of gluttony. 15 days of lazy bones. Oh well. I have slacken off my training and my diet. This is bad. Come March, I know I will have to be harsh on myself and be back on my regime. The health check this round wasn't fantastic. I went up one notch - no thanks to all the Christmas eating, New Year dinners and snackings! So I shall set my ground and be back to where I was. 3 months from now till the next health check, I should and must pass with flying colours. And of cos, to lose the very last 6 kg. =)

I have so much to update about my life.
Work, family, friendships, community.
Yet, I seem to have nothing in words that I feel like writing at the moment. I realised I have many unpublished posts where I penned down the immediate emotions and feelings when that particular incident happened. But they never got posted and are now still saved as drafts. Perhaps one by one I will start posting them. To reflect my days since the beginning of 2011. I haven't been in the best of moods since I knew I flunked my exam and the retest is in a week's time. I have completely lost faith in passing. I could only go through the motion and pray real hard for a mircale. In any cae, will be taking leave to study next week. So wish me luck people. i can only do or i die.

As for work, things have been on a pretty negative side. With the sad amount of bonus and a little bit of increment, I guess I fall back into my comfort zone and stay where I am at the moment regardless how negative or sad I could be feeling. It's just a job that pays me well I guess, just as everyone says. There are certain changes at work in terms of team structure wise and people wise which I am getting edgy with. I feel suffocated at times as well. But being here in Singapore, I cannot make do with another job that does not pay me as well as it can for now. Not until I can finish off my study loan and whatever loans I might have.

Family. This is an area that I am thankful for. The love from my parents never ceasing. The silence but presence of my brother. Makes me still want to go home and just rest my soul most of the time these days. Just to be home to watch some TV, eat dinner and drink soup. The simple family presence in my life is what keeps me sane at the moment. There was a dispute just before CNY for my mum and my aunt. To cut the story short and for those who have already known the story, it is now resolved. Thou my crazy aunt hasn't called to talk to my mum yet, but well at least I know my mum is not as upset as when it first happened. And I love the result of the talk which my mum courageously had with my aunt. I AM FINALLY GOING TO HAVE MY OWN ROOM! *whhhhheeeeeeee*

After close to 3 years.. I am finally going to have my room to myself. My cousins are finally moving out. My mum has brought the topic up and wala! In a short span of few weeks, they found themselves and apartment at Kovan and come March 1st, they will be moving out and me, will have my own room . I can then start making plans to have a major overhaul for my little room. I guess with this change, things will be different. I would surely look forward to going home and spending time in my room.. listening to music, watch drama serials, sing to myself, do hula hoops in the room, and many other things with my light on! Suddenly, it seems I have so much things that I have never really had a chance to do in my own little room. I am excited. However, on the other hand, I guess I will miss my cousins much. Miss the talks we have at night, the random laughs, the gossips we have, having them check out my new buys whenever I go shopping, the "advices" I get from them for mnay random things, the good nights and the good mornings. Oh well, I guess it is sad that we have to part but I guess we three needed our own space. If my house was any bigger with another room, I would really love to have them around the house. They do make a difference being around. So maybe the good thing is that they are just staying at Kovan so it makes coming home on weekends for them easier too. Dinners and lunches will surely be so much more appreciated in times to come. In a way to not think about sad partings, I shall start planning my room, the designs, the wall colour and many other miscellanous matters as well =) And of cos, A ROOM WARMING PARTY is sure to be lined up! =) yet another reason to party!

FRIENDS this at the moment in my life has been the most AWESOME TIME ever. we have always been around for one another and I am glad we still are. With the new injects of 2 new found friends, we begin to have random parties, meetups every now and then and I am yet again thankful for this part of my life and for these wonderful friends in my life. Strangely how we different all of us can be and yet, we have stuck around and been through thick and thin for close to 14 years! I appreciate each and everyone. more than i could ever express. the boys thou still imature and childish at many times but you know you could depend on them whenever you need them to be. the girls. no need to say much but yes I love them. people whom i can simply be myself with. to cry to laugh to whine. thank you girls very much.

On a sadder note.. Parting are never easy. And these 2 months into the new year, I would say I have enough of saying goodbyes or "leaving" someone for good. My french boss has left for good and back to Zurich where he starts a new career thou still in the same bank. I believe it is the best for him esp with a young baby, being close to family is more than important reason to relocate back. So here I wish you, JM, the best in all is to come and definitely, I will miss having you around. With parting comes new beginnings!

Wow, this seems to be a super long posting!
Maybe the next posting will just be filled with pictures instead. As for now, thanks for checking starrylainez now and then! Till then, take care and PEACE!